Monday, April 20, 2009

Everlasting Gobstoppers

We have realized over the past couple of weeks, that some of us are living in a misty haze of our own reality. These people are walking around creating fallacies in their minds, out of things that never existed. Reminding us of Willy Wonka's Everlasting Gobstopper Machine. When harsh reality hits, some of us tend to cope by processing this new information into a choicy cluster of goody-goodness.

Here are a few flavors:

"Don't call me ever again!"
+[GOBSTOPPER MACHINE]=
"She's playing hard to get GRAPE GOBSTOPPER"


"I think you're cool."
+[Gobstopper Machine]=
"We should be in a monogamous relationship RASPBERRY GOBSTOPPER"


"I don't find you attractive."
+[Gobstopper Machine] =
"You think I'm fine as hell ORANGE GOBSTOPPER"


"My shit is complicated. We need to take it slow."
+[Gobstopper Machine] =
"I love you and we can make this work WATERMELON GOBSTOPPER"


"You're fired!"
+[Gobstopper Machine] =
"Should I come to work early Monday MANGO GOBSTOPPER"


"I have no money in my bank account."
+[Gobstopper Machine] =
"Let's buy up the bar BLUEBERRY GOBSTOPPER"


"I leave status updates every hour on Facebook."
+[Gobstopper Machine] =
"I'm not on Facebook regularly. I only use it for networking GREEN APPLE GOBSTOPPER"


"I like to be tied up, choked, and spanked."
+[Gobstopper Machine] =
"I'm not a Freak STRAWBERRY GOBSTOPPER"


"I'm going to file for a restraining order!"
+[Gobstopper Machine] =
"She's playing hard to get...again LEMON-LIME GOBSTOPPER"


As you can see, some coping mechanisms make life much more delicious to hear. Sometimes, the reality of the situation is what truly needs to be heard.

What's your flavor?

1 comment:

  1. Again, The real. I need one of those Blueberry ones. LOL. Kudos.

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